Sorry to be so err... negative... but I have been cranky for these couple of days. Just think of it as having assignments everytime you have a lesson. It's annoying, frustrating and most of all infuriating... I think I have also developed a kind of swear-a-lot syndrome too... Maybe it's uni influences but maybe because I have been quite cranky these past couple of days... Whichever way you want to put it I want to talk about trains... Yes... the annoying transportation that seems to be so important in our daily lives and as much as you have to hate it (don't ask me why) train is probably one of the most used and a particular public transport that I adore (and am not trying to be sarcastic here).
I have never noticed how much you think about anything when you go into a train alone standing side by side with strangers, avoiding their distant gazes and occasionally make eye-to-eye contact with another stranger... It is strange... but today I caught my usual train (err maybe not as usual in that context but good enough, note: I always leave house at 8 am for certain days) and believe it or not it was cramped!! (Daa!) anyways... it was completely full and so I have to stand in such an awkward position that I only have one hand to hold my folder and no room to put it down (most of the times I do this to avoid my work being lost and I am paranoid when my things get lost) and one hand clutching anything that I could grasp onto for dear life. And as fascinating as it may be I actually finding myself thinking and constantly gazing at random spaces and trying to avoid other travelling eyes. And I notice too that people as though we are cramped together in such a small space we actually want to avoid each other... Each of us want our own space no matter how small... And I also notice that groupings are also present. Because there are two groups of people who are travelling by the train and each of them travel with person/s of whom they know or acquintance with... They tend to be the loudest and also have the most comfortable space, even though people might bump onto them or anything they don't particularly respond... And I also realised that when we are alone and surrounded by strangers we find ourselves in such awkward situations that even a slight brush of some materials onto someone else make us apologise for something so incredibly minor and minute... We respond also to our territory by the things that we wear and we bring with us... And quite truthfully I found myself not caring whatever happen on my back because I know that my bag would separate me from the people on the back of me and also I tend to notice that I use my folder to be able to separate me from the people surrounding me... And I also notice the guy standing in front of me wearing a rather thick jacket would tend to be more comfortable because the jacket becomes a set of boundaries and also because a human's back is normally the most sensitive part we tend to wear or bring something that would set those boundaries and make us more comfortable and know that the things that we use to protect our back gives us comfort and some sort of protection (confusing statement...) ... Maybe I'm just being overly detailed in my views but I swear it is just so weird noticing how I do things and think about them and thought what other people would think when they are put into this confined space with unknown strangers...
By the way I didn't notice this because of a 15 minute journey from B to C (literally) the train was actually delayed by at least 30 minutes!!! How slack is that?? It pisses me off!! Gosh!! And I thought I was going to be early... but it turns out I didn't miss the lecture at all... they were having some difficulties I think...
Anyways... back to my err... psychological analysis... hehehehe... I also notice quite funnily that the people who are short tend to look very awkward and look down towards the ground or in my case I would look at odd spaces where there are no face and I tend to stare at people's clothes and think about it... like for instance I saw this guy wearing a white jacket... it looks quite thick then I started to wonder quite strangely enough would that jacket be washed regularly??? Because I thought... here's a guy... hmm... well... guys aren't normally or paticularly very good with their laundries and this guy particularly doesn't seem like it... hmm... strange ain't it??? I know it sounds stupid but honestly that was what I was thinking... And I also notice the guy in front of me... (not the white jacket guy) who is taller than most of the people in the carriage, seems to look up preferably at the ceiling or look out the window (lucky guy hmmph...) so I thought it sort of indicates that height also has some issues in our minds... and in our actions... the way we react when we are surrounded by strangers, the way we stand, the way we try to avoid the unknowns... strange... weird... especially in a train ride...
I know that it might seems useless but try it someday... it is quite refreshing to actually think of some sort of social analysis of how the modern society looks at the world around them... from a personal perspective of course... hehehe... I'm like an amateur psychologist now...
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